screaming bloody all night

bronchitis? is that what you are in my chest? im trying to make you better, i bought the lung flush, and threw out my smokes, and got some nicotine gum. but why does one snide remark from someone that doesn't have any faith in me, cause me to want to fail at this and just smoke 3 of you charming little rolls at once.

one day ill prove myself right. if only i knew what right was.

you are all so upside down, and i sure am sad.

was gonna

was gonna paint that shitty wall. but didnt.

was gonna paint my nails. but didnt.

was gonna cut my dogs nails. but didnt.

was gonna catch up on work, but cant.

was gonna quit smoking, but still have one left.

instead im just staring at my ceiling, feeling how much my throat hurts, and feeling the anxiety of my impending insomnia.